Last weekend, in the penthouse of an upscale, downtown hotel, I attended my first sex party. Fair enough, I thought. I was skeptical. How amazing could the participants of a paid orgy really be, even if it was invite-only? How unfair.

Sex parties are events where people are allowed to participate in sexual activity with others, often in view of the other attendees. We asked Georgia Di Mattos, co-founder of home testing sexual health app iPlaySafe , to discuss the benefits, misconceptions and etiquette at sex parties — and share advice about how to pick the right event for you:. The adult lifestyle is expanding, and the adult partying scene is growing fast, says Di Mattos. How long they last depends on the party. Some parties may be held in country houses and last for the weekend; others are on cruise ships and may last a week or two. However, people are not free to have sex with anyone they want. There are a few things to be aware of when attending sex parties for the first time:.

If you've never been to a sex party, what do you picture them looking like? Sweaty orgies where people penetrate one another as a way of saying hi? Some other intimidating, sordid fuckfest that's probably best left to more extroverted, hyper-qualified sex-havers than the likes of you? You're not necessarily wrong, but there are plenty of sex parties where you'd fit right in. Super-elaborate sex parties do exist—as do super chill, casual ones.

Is it a big club full of writhing bodies? Or how about two couples swapping partners? Interestingly enough, a sex party can be all of the above, says Ava Cadell, Ph. Here's everything you wanted to know about sex parties and how to figure out if you might want to try one out.